A Change Is Gonna Come

Or I should say changes. For one, I’m done with spending money on unhealthy food like soda and snacks. The next time I go grocery shopping I’m not buying anything unhealthy. It’s probably part of the reason I have headaches and I’m so tired all the time. Since I’ve moved from my mom’s house it feels like I’ve been eating more and I think that’s because I’m eating unhealthy. So no more of that. Plus I don’t want my son to grow up addicted to sugar and sweet stuff. I’m putting my foot down now.

I’m also going to not buy anything unless I absolutely need it. I’ve been buying clothes and stuff that I don’t really need because I have plenty. I have plenty of clothes and I don’t need anymore. Unless it’s something for Peyton, I’m not buying it. I’m tired of being so selfish with my money especially since I don’t have much of it.

I also need to get a few things in order. I have to think about other people before myself. Therefore I need to start cleaning more around the house when I’m not working. I always feel like I need time to myself, so when Peyton is at Mike’s and I don’t have to work until later or at all, I always take time and just lounge around and stuff. Well that’s pretty unproductive especially when I could be cleaning or doing laundry or dishes. So no more laying around doing nothing because it’s pointless. I guess in a way I don’t deserve time to myself because I need to take care of others like Peyton and Cody. I know that I don’t do nearly enough for either of them so I’m going to start doing more.

Another change which is probably the biggest is that every Sunday I’ll be going to church from now on. I loved Kristen’s church (NLCC) where I went today. The people are really friendly and the atmosphere is really laid back and fun. I enjoyed it a lot and I plan to go back even though the drive kinda sucks. I just hope next week Peyton will want to maybe stay with the other kids so he can have fun with them.

I know that I always say that I’m going to make changes and usually they don’t happen, but I feel like I have the power to change now because I have God in my life. I wrote a really long journal entry when I was at work one day and I will definitely type it up and post it. I will have to leave a little of it out because it’s extremely personal though. I’m off to take the trash to the dump now and then to return Peyton’s clothes since they don’t fit him at the mall. I hope everyone has a great day!

Day 07 – Someone Who Has Made Your Life Worth Living For

Well, I might just be a tad greedy on this post and name two someone’s that have made my life worth living. Actually, make that three. Eh, I can’t help it. First and foremost, I must say God. Knowing that I always have someone to turn to no matter what is life changing in itself. God is always there, watching and helping in time of need. I know that I am alive today because of the choices that He helped me make throughout my life. Secondly, I have to say Lil P. Without him, my life would feel void. He is a part of me and that will never change. He is my one and only (well, at least until I have more kids haha). Third and lastly, I’d definitely say Cody. Over the past six months, he has become the person that I know that I am going to spend the rest of my life with. Well, I knew that since day one, but the more time I spend with him, the deeper in love I fall. I know that he will always be there for me no matter what, and I love him for that.

Day 05 – Something I Hope To Do In My Life

I tend to make goals and never achieve them. There is one thing that I most definitely want to do in my life though. I want to raise my son to be the best person he can be. I want him to grow up and continue to be smart and successful in whatever he chooses to do. I want to always believe that he has made the right choices and I want to support him in whatever he wants to do in his life. I never want to let him down. I always want to be there for him. This is the thing that is most important to me, and I want him to know that I’d do whatever it takes to make him happy, no matter the cost.

Nuvaring

So I know this is a weird subject to talk about, but my birth control hasn’t been really effective (I’ve had a lot of breakthrough bleeding and such). So I called my doctor and he said to try Nuvaring. At first I was like “There is no way I’m sticking something up there for 3 weeks then taking it out. Ew.” But so far, I like it. I don’t have to worry about taking a pill every morning. I don’t feel anything. It’s nice. The only downfall is that it could possibly slip out during sex (which I’m not really having any at the moment haha). So I have no worries about it now. I will cross that bridge when it comes.

On to other news…nothing much has been happening lately. M and I are…well, trying to work it out. Who knows. He has shown some change recently, so that’s good. But I’m not keeping my hopes up. I just don’t want to be let down again.

Lil P has been really fussy lately and he hasn’t been sleeping well at all. It’s taking a real toll on me.  But at least he is good when he is up (for the most part) so I don’t get too frustrated.

I have a secret. I can’t tell though. It’s driving me crazy. I think I”m going to keep this one to myself though. At least for now :-X

Fat Free Milk

I used to not be able to drink fat free milk. Now it comes as a second nature. It’s weird how that happens. Our tastebuds supposedley change every 7 years. I am starting to believe its true. In other news…Lil P has some new toys. Check it out…

Peyton in his chair

I love his outfit in this picture too. It’s so cute. I picked it out at a cosignment shop. Those places actually have decent stuff. They sort of smell like mold though haha. I made sure to wash everything before I let him wear it.

Hmm…what else has been going on. Yesterday was July 4th, but it rained ALL day so I didn’t really celebrate. M and I went to Charlestown Races and Slots and I won $100.00 on a slot machine. That happens every single time I go there. It’s actually kind of weird. It’s always a hundred dollars and it’s usually on one of the two machines that I like to play. I like watching the horses run, but I don’t bet because I always lose.

Right now P is in his crib. I’m trying to make a set bedtime for him around 9:30. Usually he is drinking or finishing a bottle around that time. Normally he goes to bed between 9pm and 11pm. He will normally sleep until at least 8am. So that’s not too bad. I get my sleep and he gets his.

We just started feeding him baby foods a few days ago. He gets about 1/2 of a Gerber container at a time. He is pretty good with the spoon. I will start mixing a little rice into his baby food since he doesn’t like the taste of it too much. Hopefully he will be eating baby cereal soon by itself.

Well, that’s about it for this update. I’m going to the doctor this coming Friday at 8:45am. I am going to have her check  my thyroid because lately I’ve been extremely moody, irritable, extremely tired, and I have weird appetite changes. Hopefully that is what’s wrong and it’s nothing too serious. Ta-ta for now!