Thursday Thirteen
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| Thirteen Things about LindseyA
1. I’m 20 years old.
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Infatuated
So right now I’m sitting at my desk, wondering why I’m not accomplishing anything, such as my overdue homework for Ashworth. Hmm…because I am a procrastinater. Yay for those kinds of people. Work today just would not end, and I only worked a short 6 hour shift. I think it was because I knew that I had tomorrow off. This week just isn’t working out well for me at all. Tonight and Friday night are the only nights I’ll get to see Mike, and it’s for a very short period of time. He gets off work at 11 tonight (I believe) and has to go in at 7am tomorrow. Then when he gets off tomorrow, he heads home and then I work Friday until 5pm and he works until 11pm on Friday. Saturday morning I have training and he works Saturday night and Sunday morning. It’s no fun. Jobs suck so bad sometimes. I do have Friday to look forward to. I’ll be getting two paychecks because I didn’t pick the one up from last week. But, that money is pretty much already spent because I have to cancel my one Verizon account. Booo for 2 year contracts and cell phones.
I really want to write, but I have such a boring life and I really have nothing to write about. Josh was off all week except the few hours he worked on Monday. That made me sad. He and Jamie are the only ones I really like working with. Foote is starting to grow on me. He’s just sort of…mean. Not mean, but I can’t think of a good word to use instead of it. I like him though. Deb isn’t bad, but I don’t get to work with her much. Next week should be better since Josh will be back and Thanksgiving will be over with. I hate holidays sometimes. They are way too stressful and everyone forgets what they are really all about. I mean, I’m being a hypocrite by saying that, but it’s the truth.
I miss everyone in Harrisonburg. I’m going to go down there on Saturday after I get done with my job training. I can’t wait. Kristen and I are going to hang out for a while. No one else has really gotten back to me, but oh well. Hopefully I can end up staying down there for a while because I don’t want to drive down there for like 2 hours then drive right back up. It would be nearly pointless besides me getting to see Kristen. That pretty much makes it worth it, but yeah, you know what I mean.
Ok time for some more sad country songs then I guess I’m off to stay the night at Mikes to spend a little time with him.
Gatorrrrrrraddeeeee
Yeah, so life. It happens sometimes. It can be good or bad. I think I had a little bit of both today. It hurts to think about things. I wish that there could be a pill you could take that would just let you think about all the good things in your life. It wouldn’t let your mind wander to what could happen or what may be happening. It wouldn’t let you feel upset or angry at people, especially those who don’t deserve to be upset at. I overreact and think way too much sometimes. My imagination runs wild and with a crazy imagination and a lot of built up tension and jealousy, it pretty much causes a nuclear bomb to explode inside of me.
I just want to trust him so bad. I want to believe every word he says and have no doubt that he means it with all of his heart. My brain knows that this is true…that he isn’t lying to me and he does mean what he says. But it’s like there is this tiny little spot somewhere in my brain that doesn’t want me to believe it. It sucks. I want to have an operation to get that part cut out so I can believe everything and not have second thoughts about it.
I like him so much more than he thinks I do. I wish I could somehow prove to him that he means a lot to me. It’s hard though. It’s almost like he doesn’t want me to like him. I know that’s not true though. I’m just babbling on now. That’s all for tonight. Sleep fixes everything.
No Luck There
So congrats to me, I’m not pregnant. Thank GOD. I started yesterday. Guess it was just the weird birth control and all of the stress I’ve been under lately. Anyway…I don’t really have much else to update. I burned 2 cds today and that’s about it. My days are so boring sometimes. I’m about to leave and go shopping…get out of the house then go see Mike. I have no idea what we are going to do, probably nothing, but that’s fine by me.
Maybe, Baby
Soooo….for a few weeks in October, I got really sick. I was in the ER twice and I finally made an appointment with an internal medicine doctor to get looked at. She told me to stop taking my birth control (which I had only been taking for about a month or so). So I did and she gave me some antibiotics and such and I’ve gotten better. I never started my birth control back up, and now I’m about 2 weeks late. My last period was on October 2nd. I took a pregnancy test on Monday and it was negative. But I was reading on the internet about how they need certain levels of that H….whatever it is and the test I took needs at least 100 and you usually don’t get to 100 until you’re 5th week of pregnancy or so and that would be about another week for me. I’m scared out of my mind. I want to go buy another test that will be more likely to show me more accurate results, but I think I might just wait another week and see if I start. I know you can have a late period if you stop taking birth control, but I stopped taking it on the 26th of September. So I should be having a period by now. I have no idea what to do. I want to tell Mike but I’m scared to tell him. I guess I’ll just wait until next Monday, and if I haven’t started I’ll buy another test. This is driving me insane though.
As for everything besides that, life is great. Mike and I are doing good. I like him a lot and I know that he likes me too and that’s really comforting. I’ve been working a lot, pulling some extra hours because we lost a lot of help. I have been working an average of 9 hours a day with no lunch break. It hasn’t been bad though…bigger paychecks. And time goes by way faster. I really like what I do and who I work with. It’s a lot of fun, but it can be overwhelimg and stressful at times. That’s all part of a job though. I went shopping last weekend and bought a lot of new clothes. I have tried to stop buying so many jeans and t shirts. That’s all I have worn since elementary school. Now I’m becoming more of a woman and I’m buying nicer clothes and I love it. I think that I look nicer and I feel way more confident when I wear them. I love it.
Well I’m getting pretty tired and it’s only 9:30. I think I’ll go read for a while then head to bed after talking to Mike. If anyone has any advice for me, please let me know!
